Addicted to First Dates

I have a confession to make.   I am hopelessly addicted to the first stages of dating someone new.  I love the excitement of a first date, wondering what to wear, spending hours getting ready, and the look of appreciation on my date’s face when we first see each other.  I get lost in the endless conversations, sharing favorite stories the other person hasn’t heard yet, getting to know one another.  I like to play the cards in my deck, flirting, meeting his tone, laughing at each other’s jokes.  I thoroughly enjoy the intense interest in everything I say and do, and I eat up his compliments like chocolate chips.  I long for the butterflies in my stomach with anxious anticipation, and crave the tingling of my skin as he brushes his hand against mine.  I even welcome the feeling of disappointment when the evening ends.  I like the spontaneity that comes along with the beginning stages of dating, experiencing new things with someone new.  These are the great things about dating.  But, just like any other addiction, there is a price to pay for indulging.  The men that I attract seem to get on the hook so quick. It starts with calls and texts, asking what my plans are, attempting to invade all of my free time.  They want to go from first date to wedding day in a blink of an eye, which inevitably leads to heartbreak or anger.  So, any time someone asks me to dinner or feeds me a line, I try to remember the fact that I am in emotional rehab, and I am focusing on me.  So I say no.  And then I go home, eat ice cream, and try to pretend that I am not lonely.

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Resetting My Soul

I am a single mom, 40+ and fabulous. I've been through a lot of crap in my life, just like the rest of the world, and I use my experiences, good and bad, as fodder for my work. My writing comes from the gut. Sometimes I write about a sudden emotion, and sometimes I write about something long term. I strive to write stuff that is tangible and easy to absorb, so whether you agree with what I write or not, if it makes you feel, makes you react, then I have accomplished my goal.

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